.:A Little Bit Of Advice – Listening vs. Hearing:.

I hope that today is filled with good things for all of you!

Today, I thought we would just chat a bit about Listening.  I know that all of you out there know what listening means.  It is the act of taking sounds from your surroundings into your ear holes and paying attention to those sounds.  Hearing, on the other hand, is a completely different creature.  That is taking into your ear holes sounds, but not really soaking up what it is.

Lets take, as an example, outside noises.  Every single day, you will “hear” the same sounds.  Crickets playing their songs, birds chirping, frogs croaking.  After your initial “listening” it all becomes noise.  Just noise.  You zone it out.  Your ear holes accept it, but your brain just sends it into the nether regions of your brain as something “un”important. See what I mean?

It goes the same for conversations.  You can hear a person all that you want, but are you actually LISTENING to the words that are coming out of their mouth?  Are you taking their vocalizations into your ear cups, siphoning them down your ear holes, and allowing it to seep into the mushy parts of your brain?

Listening, TRULY listening, is a trait that many people do not carry.  It is a shame that we have all trained ourselves to “HEAR” but not to LISTEN.

If you are talking to someone, pay attention to them.  Accept their vocalizations into your noggin.  Give them the RESPECT of true absorption of their ideas and thoughts, or LISTENING to what they say, even if you do not agree.  Don’t interrupt, don’t make yourself out to be the asshole friends.  Because that is what you are when you constantly interrupt.  An Asshole.  That persons respect for you will drop off, and it will get to the point that they just don’t want to talk to you anymore.  I mean, who would if they can’t get a word in edgewise.

Allow that person to talk, allow their words and thoughts to flow.  And when they are done, you give your input.  Don’t just jump on the bandwagon of, “I know you are mid-sentence, but what you say is boring me so I am just going to pop in with my opinion.  YOU DO NOT MATTER TO ME.”

We all deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.  It is a give and take thing.  As is talking and LISTENING.

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.:Share Love: Not Hate:.

Hello my dearest friends. I do hope that all of you are doing well today.  Goodness knows that it is one of “Those” days for me, but I will make it through.

Today, I want to talk to you about something.  It is something that has been bothering me for so long that I couldn’t put a time on it.  And I want your input as well.  So by all means, share your insight, your thoughts in the comments.

Too many people now-a-days are so busy spreading hate that it is hard to see love anywhere.  What can we accomplish if all we have is hatred and nastiness?  Nothing.  There is simply nothing.  What good can come out of having such an ugly outlook?  I just don’t understand all the viciousness, all the chaos that is now being thrown around.

Lets take for example this whole “Gay Marriage” thing.

I have seen so many that support the right of two HUMANS being able to share their love, and I am so proud of that.  But then, there are more and more people showing such nasty and revolting attitudes that it is tarnishing something that is so beautiful and deserving of everyone in the world.  This is about love people.  No one is trying to tear down your rights.  It doesn’t destroy the sanctity of marriage.  You know what does?  Going out with your friends, getting drunk and sleeping with other people when your wife/husband sits at home waiting for you.  It is you abusing your wife/husband.  It is you being an all around douchebag.  THAT is what is destroying marriage.

It is not like someone within the LGBTQ lifestyle is going around your neighborhood and forcing anyone into destroying your marriage.  All they want is to be able to show the love that they have inside.  Just like you do with your significant other.  This is about love, not about sex.  WHO GIVES A SHIT?  Who cares about anothers orientation?  Who cares about their color?  Who cares about their religion? What does it matter?  Because in the end, we all have the same color blood.  We are ALL the same on the inside.  OUR SPIRITS are the same.  You will receive respect no matter who the other person is, if you give it.

I know that there is going to be trolls, there always are.  Trolls are just bullies hiding behind their computer screens because they are hiding the fact that they are cowards.  They are afraid. It is childish.  It is stupid.  And it needs to come to an end.

We are all humans.  I will respect you fully if I get the same in return.  My attitude depends on yours.

I know that what I am saying is not going to make a huge impact on the world.  I am just one person.  But I am going to say this:

It doesn’t matter to me what color you are.

It doesn’t matter to me what your sexual orientation is.

It doesn’t matter to me what gender you are.

It doesn’t matter to me what religion you are.

It doesn’t matter what your beliefs are.

As long as you respect me, I will stand behind you.

.:Magickal Misfits – Blog Response to Brenda Crozier from YouTube:.

First off my friends, I want to say a big thank you to Mrs. Brenda Crozier from YouTube.  Her latest video was simply brilliant and I wanted to share my thoughts on it.  I will post the video HERE so by all means feel free to take a look, that way you may better understand the gibberish and rambling that is to follow.

Many of you that have been here for a while know that I am a Pagan.  I have been for many years, 21 to be exact.  I have found my place within religion and am extremely happy within my chosen spiritual path.  I am also a fully disabled woman.  Just keep that in mind for what I am about to say.

DISCLAIMER:  (The very fact that I have to put this in here kills me but it must be done.)

  • Yes, I am Pagan.  
  • NO I do not worship the devil.  I do not believe in this “Satan” person.  While I know that there is evil in the world, I do not feel that using “Satan” as an excuse for the bad things that we do, because that is exactly what it is, AN EXCUSE. 
  • Yes, I do believe in God.  My belief is just different than yours.
  • No, I will not try to “force” my ways upon you, nor will I belittle you if you don’t believe the same as me.  That’s not how we roll here.
  • If you decide to leave negative comments, or harass this community in any way, nothing bad will happen to you with the exception of your comments will NOT be approved and I will block you from my page.  Kthx

Now that I have that foolishness out of the way, ON WE GO!

I have epilepsy, migraines, and something wrong with my bones.  I put it that way because I have a doctors appointment in July to see if I have Rheumatoid Arthritis.  I also have every symptom of Multiple Sclerosis with the exception of the lesions on the brain.  I have my issues, everyone does.

As of late, there has been a lot of debate within the Pagan Community if those with physical or mental disabilities are able to “fully” take part within Magick.  “Newer” folk are saying that if you aren’t perfect, you aren’t able to really “GIVE” to the community at all.

Well, excuse me for saying this but, I’m calling BULLSHIT.

Just because I have tremors, doesn’t mean that I can’t hold a wand.  Just because I have severe migraines doesn’t mean that I can’t Draw Down The Moon.  Just because I use a cane, doesn’t mean that I can’t stand before my altar.  Just because my hands, back and knees hurt doesn’t mean that I can feel nature and hear HER call.

What it does mean is that I am not perfect.  I cherish those imperfections.  They make me who I am today.  They make me PERFECTLY IMPERFECT.  They make me stronger.  They make me more compassionate to others.  They make me ME.

Like Brenda says in her video,

“Be proud of your struggles. Be proud of everything that has happened to you in your life, your life experiences because thats what makes you such an amazing Witch. Thats what makes you such an amazing magickal spirit.”

Well said Sister.  Well said.

This is words that we can all live by, no matter our religion, or color, our gender.  Be proud of who you are and all that you have been through.  YOU have learned and grown with every single situation.  That is something to be proud of.  You are more than you were yesterday, and will be more tomorrow than you are today.  Be proud of that.  And don’t feel the need to belittle anyone else because they are different than you.  You don’t know their struggles or their journey.

Go forth with love and peace in your hearts friends.

.:The Safety of our Children:.

Hi my darling loves.  Todays post is stemming from an article that I saw and want to share with all of you.  Especially you parents out there.  You can find the article HERE.

The article talks about an 11 year old boy walking home from the school bus and being approached by a man in a van.  The man asks for directions, but acted like he couldn’t hear.  So the boy moved closer.  When he did, the side door opened and another person tried to grab the boy.  Thankfully the child got away by slipping out of his backpack and ran home.

I do want to say that there is a bit of controversy with this story because the boy was able to give a very good (and I mean VERY good) description of the person he spoke with, along with a detailed description of the van itself.  They were detailed enough to be used by a sketch artist to draw a picture of the attempted kidnapper.

Now, I can understand the controversy.  How could a child possibly remember so much?  To answer this question, I went to my informant.  She is trained in the art of Kid-Fu and is knowledgeable in the ways of the Force.  She is…. *dramatic music inserted here* My 13 year old.  Our conversation follows:

Me:  “Oh great child o’mine.  Lend me your wisdom in the ways of Kid-Fu.”
This of course garners the raised eyebrow and the eye-roll that is so prominant in this ancient art.
Her: “Really mom?”
She shakes her head and facepalms at this point. Her powers are indeed… um… Powerful.
Me: “Oh wise one, keeper of my heart, the bes…”
Her: “Mom, stop it.”
Me: “Fine then. Geez. Sit down, I need to ask you something.”
This receives another of the eye-rolls and she sits. I proceed to tell her about the article.
Me: “Due to the fact that you are only two years older than this kid, give me your opinion about this. If this happened to you, do you think you would be able to remember details like that?”
Her: “Since it is something like that, and scary, then yes, I would remember. Kids have the ability to see things clearer Mom. We aren’t stupid.”
Me: “I know you aren’t stupid pookie.”
This got the eyebrow raised again. Her skills are off the charts now.
Her: “Don’t call me pookie.”
Me: “But you are my pookie, you have always been my pookie.”
Another head shake.
Her: “But to get back to what I was saying. If it is something so,” she pauses at this. “Traumatic, we remember. I can still remember the Chucky Cheese incident and what the guy looked like and was wearing.”

*The chucky cheese thing:  My daughter caught someone trying to kidnap a kid.  They soon after brought in markers that they would mark the parents and kids with.  This was 6 years ago y’all.*

So basically, the Wise-One of Kid-Fu said that they can remember details such as the one described in the article.  And I am going to believe her on that.

Which brings me to what I wanted to talk to all of you about.  This will be in BulletPoint mode okay?

  • Always teach your children not to talk to strangers.  If they are approached, they should run to you immediately.  Then and only then should they talk to someone they don’t know.
  • Always teach your child the “Scream.”  I know that screaming is annoying as hell.  But in the case of being Kidnapped or harmed, a scream can work wonders.  Explain to them to make as much noise as possible.  Scream as loud as they can.  By drawing attention to themselves, and their attacker, the attacker can get caught much easier.
  • Always teach your children the “Dead Weight.”  Dead weight is so hard to explain.  It is the action of relaxing all of the muscles in your body at once, causing you to become heavier and more unwieldy.
  • Always help your children with memory.  Explain to them that they need to remember as much detail as possible in the case of something happening.  Make a game out of it.  Have someone in the family stand in front of them and allow them to look at them for a set time limit (like 10 seconds) and the person leaves the room.  The person then changes on thing about themselves (like removing a sock or putting their hair up if it was down,) and then they return to the room.  For each one your child gets right, they get a point.  At the end of the “game” they get a prize.  By doing this, they can learn that details are important.  They will be able to spend just a split second getting the full picture.
  • Always watch your children.  Yes, we should be able to let our children play outside and not have to worry about some sicko getting their grubby nasty hands on them.  But unfortunately, that isn’t how the world works anymore.  Get together with your neighbors and set up a “Watching Tree.”  One family takes guard duty every day.  And keep in touch with them.

Friends, do you have any ideas of more things we can do to protect our children?  Anything that we could add to this list?

By all means, share in the comments below!  And share this post with everyone.  The more that see it, the more help we can provide to families everywhere.  By all of us sharing our thoughts and ideas, we can save a child’s life.

.:Saturdays Thoughts:.

Hello Friends.  I hope that all of you are doing wonderfully this weekend.  And yes, it is 3 o’clock am on Saturday and I am up thinking about things.

As many of you know, I lost someone that was dear to me.  While I am still shocked, devastated and generally blah, it brings up some thoughts that I feel I need to get out.

I have talked about Loss before, on how to deal with it in healthy ways.  So in a sense, I am adding to it.

When we lose someone, we feel that our lives just stop.  For that split second, the world stops spinning and everything just shuts down.  For that moment, you cannot feel anything but pain and heartache.  The tears flood out and drown you in the deepest pits of sorrow that you feel you will never breach the surface again.

Well my darlings, there is one thing that we all need to remember during this time.

Those that are living are counting on you too.  You still have people around you that need your love and your support. You will all need support during this time.  Now don’t misunderstand what I am saying.  I am not saying that you need to act all strong and unbreakable.  I am saying that you need to use ease others shoulders, share your sorrow and allow others to share yours.  Remember that life does go on, even if those that have passed are “gone.”  Take your time to grieve and shed those tears, but don’t let it overtake your entire life.  Remember that you still have people around you that love and cherish you.

.:Live Life To The Fullest:.

My friends.  I do apologize for my lack of posting the last few days, but with the death of someone very dear to me, I have just not had the get up and go to post anything.  I am still wading through the shock of it all honestly.

Look y’all.  This is important.  All of you deserve to live your lives fully and to the greatest potential. All of you deserve to know what truly loving who you are is.  Too many of us get stuck within that realm of Self-Hate and Self-Pity.  Many of us get stuck within our every day lives, doing the same routine over and over again, and it isn’t because we want to, it is simply out of what we see as necessity. But lets really think about what that drive is?  Is it just so you can have a better house than your neighbor?  Is it just so you can drive a better car than your brother/sister?  If you spend your life living just to show another up, then you aren’t living.

It is time for all of us to shed that doubt; to open up who we are as a person deep inside.  Do you feel like you would be happy to adventure different places? Then venture out my friend.  Do you feel like you want to dress “differently” but can’t due to social standards? Hell with those standards!  BREAK THEM and be who you are.

It is time for us as a society to break down the walls of trends, stereotypes and all of that foolish bullshit that comes along with it.  We need to take the road less traveled, evolve into beings of happiness.

If you feel stuck, dig yourself out my friend.  I am here to help you along the way.

Love all of you!

Lilly

.:Living Advice:.

Hello my darling friends.  So glad to see you here today. I must apologize for the lateness of this post, but I will explain that in a moment.  First I want to say Welcome to all the newest members of our clan!  Welcome to the family.  Feel free to take a look around!  By all means!  If you read something and feel that you have something to add, all you have to do is hit that comment box.  We all work together here to help others!

Now as for my lateness.

I have always enjoyed the very act of writing.  It was an outlet for me throughout my life, but it was not something that I really took seriously.  I have shared my thoughts and feeling through text, but only a handful I had ever sent out to share with the world.  I even had a full length novel written at one point, but when I was finished with it, I threw it away.  *I can see my best friend Rose cringing right now!)

Well my friends, I have taken up the pen again (so to speak) and have started writing another story.  One that I intend on having published.  Which brings me into this weeks advice.

Do not ever let your confidence outweigh your worth.  What I mean by that, if you think your skills are just stupid and not worth anything, YOU ARE WRONG!

You have the ability to do anything you set your mind to.  You have the ability to do anything. Shall I say it again?  You are all worth so much in this world and have the ability to make a difference.  You have the ability to make the world a better place.  Whether it is through artistry, or volunteering.  You can do it!

Don’t ever feel that you aren’t good enough.  Because you are.  You are perfect and I love you.

Become something more than what you are today, and don’t hold yourself back.

I love you, each and every one of you.

Lilly